Carey's Reading Notes

Miracle Baby My friend said, “A miracle baby could happen. You never know!” I was 44. I had gotten off birth control pills and I was having hot flashes. Multiple times a day, an internal furnace turned on and I felt sweaty and uncomfortable. I was emotional, crying while listening to remotely sentimental audiobooks. I never used to cry. After some tests, my gynecologist informed me that I was not producing enough estrogen and that I was likely in menopause. Since the age of 39, I had skipped periods about once a year while still on birth control. Each time my period didn’t come, I took a pregnancy test that came back negative. I wrote in my calendar, ‘Pregnancy Scare of 2019’, ‘Pregnancy Scare of 2020’ and so on, until in 2024, I had missed four periods. In what I now realize were my peri-menopause years, my life had changed. At 42, I quit academia and became a data scientist for the LA county government. On my first day, I stood by the window on the 4th floor where my cubicle ...

Cape Breton Connected by land but only reluctantly A 92 year old coal miner sang his last performance with Men of the Deeps A cautionary tale against corporate greed Passed down from father to son And memorialized in song Historic Fortress of Louisbourg Takes you back to an 18th-century French town Where Air, Fire, Earth meet Water at the blacksmith's shop After a long day of driving Windy roads on the Cabot Trail Why not rest awhile At The Red Shoe Pub And let your toes tap to the fiddle May the winds carry you away to the Red shore of Nova Scotia 🌊

  Crying in My Tesla I was listening to the book Crying in H Mart On my commute to work  When I cried   I was reminded of how just the week before On my trip to Canada to visit my parents Mom and Dad showed me  How much they loved me In their eyes I am still a little girl   Dad refused to let me carry my suitcase He scorned the dog for barking at me 진아, 누가 언니한테 짖어! Jinna, how dare you bark at your older sister!   A few years ago, I stayed with Mom in Seoul Mom, her friend and I went out to an art show when her friend fell and seriously injured herself in a department store Mom was about to accompany her in an ambulance She pleaded to the store employee to help me get home 이 꼬마가 외국에서 와서… 택시좀 잡아 주세요 My little baby is from abroad… Can you please get her a taxi? She had completely forgotten that I was 42 and spoke fluent Korean That I can take care of myself   Days before this trip home Mom had prepared 육계장 beef stew, 돼지고기 볶음 marinated spicy po...